8k run today :)
Hurray.
Back to the routine! 12 k on Saturday is my goal!

And I'm so sick of love songs, so tired of tears...

Oh Ne-yo, I forgot how awesome you are.
Music has the ability to completely ruin or make my day. (exaggeration
Counting crows? Bad memories but happy ones that remind me of how much I've grown.
The Cab? Energy booster.
LMFAO? Disgust about certain nights this summer. Yet hilarious at how much ridiculousness I brought upon myself.
Adele? SHUT IT OFF. Too overplayed. I'm over it.

I love waking up in the morning and having the apartment to myself. I love walking to the patio and looking outside and seeing the world covered in snow. I love playing old music out of my stereo and dancing while I get ready for work. I love making toast with Jam and lurking Tumblr while I eat breakfast.

It seems to me that I've forgotten to slow down and just appreciate life as it is. I've been so busy that everything has been pushed to the wayside. Work, choir, other work, home, random road trip. I just need a few days to slowwwwww down. Go for a walk, a run, go shopping, eat sushi, appreciate friends, and be happy with that. I keep myself busy so I have an excuse not to do anything. Which is completely silly. I need a social life, and I need to remember that I don't need to be with people 24/7 to prove that I have friends.

So for the next two days, starting tomorrow, I get to go drill boreholes in Vermillion with Jared! We have to stay overnight on Thursday night so that will be interesting :S But I'm excited to go somewhere for work! It shall be fun and maybe we will bond. He seems like a nice guy, just kind of quiet and is one of those mumbly people that doesn't really speak loudly but rather just stumbles around with words to himself. We'll see :)

Clare: How do you want our first sexual experience to be?
Jake: Sex....y?

1. Remember that everyone you encounter today has been through or is going through something. Treat them accordingly.

2. We all have feelings and needs. We all have trouble communicating them clearly. That’s just how it is. Listen to people and try to hear what’s not being said.

3. Forgiveness is the ultimate form of love. Let disagreements and grudges go as soon as possible. The longer you leave them, the longer it’ll take to get back.

4. Always smile at the cashier in a long line. Assume that she’s doing her best under the circumstances. Give her a break. Same goes for restaurant workers and all other service professionals.

5. Everyone wants to love and be loved. Let people love you without questioning their motives.

6. Stop making people “earn” your kindness. Be kind because you want to, not as a reward for the other person being kind to you first.

7. Don’t let one negative experience (or five) with a stranger, friend or lover keep you from being the loving person you really want to be.

8. Begin to see every human encounter you have as an opportunity to learn how to become a more loving person.

9. Instead of asking what you can get from others, ask yourself: What is the best part of myself I can give in this moment? How can I offer to help another person today?

10. Say “thank you.” Say “I love you.” Say “I’m sorry.”

Homemade pizza for the win!!!!!

One of my favorite quotes from the bathroom stall of Remedy:
'In a world that makes millions on telling you to hate yourself, loving yourself is the most radical thing you can do."
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Quote from the show Suburgatory:
'Ariel, our class president, has stepped down... due to unexpected Fatness...'
OH DEAR.

Took a sick day.
Boy did I ever need it.
I have been completely here but not here all week, so I took the day to recuperate. Get back into the groove of things, and clean the crap out of my room.
Just finished running 14k. I ran 9 to river valley and back, got wayy to thirsty to do the last 5, so went back to my apartment, chugged some water, and ran the last 5k.
I feel awesome.
My legs are sore.
Gotta train for my halfie in 2 months!

Shit Asian Moms Say

Shit Girlfriends Say

I just made this chocolate cake.
It is fantastic.

Attack of the douchebags.
So there is some sort of mess on the highway going through the mountains before we even hit Revelstoke.
Major delays.
There are some people here smoking a bong, blaring 'cool' gangster beats, and being idiots in general.
I didn't realize people were so stupid.

Another day in the life of a Kelowna resident.
Mountains, bridges, water, water, more water. So beautiful.
Boats. Planes.
I'm sold. See you later. I'm never coming back!

Yes, yes, it does say backhand of god on that board. Crap loads of awesome in Kelowna!

We are at a restaurant called Raudz!
It is beautiful in here.
So busy.
Great atmosphere.
Half good company!
I love it here. Can I please never leave?
Disappearing off the face of the earth wouldn't bother anyone would it?

My name is Rachelle.
This is what I like to do:
Get Sarah to drive me places far away.
I don't ever thank her.
Then I am a grumpy bitch the whole day.
I don't speak a word to Shane or Sarah the whole day.
I also refuse to leave the hotel room except to get food.
I also like to sit in the hotel room and play on my computer just like I would in Edmonton but I'm in another city! I wonder if it will feel different if I keep doing it.
When Sarah or Shane talks to me, I'll just fake a laugh and ignore them.

Wow. I'm sick of this. Ugh.
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So first dive did not work out as planned.
We didn't have enough weighting and couldn't sink to the bottom of the water.
I had less troubles than the other two just because I was super relaxed and thought the water was amazing.
So the other 2 are kind of pissy... Grumpy, moody, whatever. It's kind of awful to hang out with grumpy people.
I'm super happy though. Kelowna is beautiful. Things will work out.
Right now I'm really tired though. 11 hours of driving, 5 hours of sleep, 2 hours of attempted diving... I'm worn out. Worst part is that Rachelle wants me to pay for gas when I'm the ONLY one driving and then it's my car if anything happens.
I had to stress the WHOLE time through the mountains because it blizzarded for half of the drive through them. Scary scary shit.
Now I'm at this beautiful little restaurant called the Grateful Fed pub. So cute. Decorated with a crapload of music things.
Love. I want to live here. Haha.

Yup. Just drove 11 hours to Kelowna and not a single fucking thank you.
You people have no fucking manners and no respect for your friends.
Fuck you. Ugh.
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I'm sleepy.
BUT SUPER EXCITED FOR KELOWNA!
SCUBA SCUBA SCUBA! :)

Random thinking led me to think about death.
I'm not afraid of death.
I think that if I died tomorrow, I'd be content with the way I have lived my life.
I've appreciated the world for what it is. I've loved friends, family, animals, random people.
I've explored the minds of a variety of people.
I've gone hiking. I've gone fishing. I've gone shopping.
I've been on a hutterite colony, I've gone to the farmers market.
I've tasted delicious cheesecake, disgusting durian, chicken feet, coffee.
I've lived alone. I've lived with my family. I've stayed at hotels, condos, dorms.
I've done yoga, pilates, gone horseriding, run 10k, biked.
I've cooked, I've baked, I've eaten at restaurants.

To me, I've explored the world that I've been able to so far.
So that's why I'm not scared. Death is natural. It happens, so I don't understand why there is such a fear of it in so many others.
I remember talking to Abhishek last summer and he said he would want to live forever.
He was extremely surprised when I said I would be happy with the way I've lived if I died the next day.
He said he wanted to do more. Do research that takes longer than a lifetime. Explore more possibilities.
I think that's the difference between my take on life than others. I've adapted, in some sense, an existential way of living my life. I give meaning and passion to my life with the things I have. I know that's the way life is. It's what I can afford, it's the people I've been surrounded with, and although I can manipulate these, I'm still happy with whatever I have.
People may argue with my definition of existentialism. But to me, it means the philosophy on life in which a person is willing to live life to the fullest without a greed for more, no matter what their life holds.
I don't desire the money that others desire. I don't desire the unbelievable love story that others desire. I don't want power, or cars, or nice mansions. I don't want to be famous. I am just happy with my life. This is where I've been placed in the world. And this is where I am 100% happy being.

Me: Happy Valentines Day
Josh: Lol Thanks
Me: Thanks for saying it back
Josh: Alright now. That's not going to happen.
Me: FUCK I just cut my finger open on a kitchen drawer.
Josh: Well on that note, Happy Valentines


WHAT A ROMANTIC.... HAHAHAHAHA

The best Valentines day.
Worked in the lab.
Went for a 4.5k run.
Had a quick dinner with dinner with Rachelle and Shane to discuss scuba this weekend, since we found out today that Thane, who was supposed to take us, can no longer go. We decided to go through someone else, which now means we have an ENTIRE day in Kelowna to just hang out. Excited? Yessss.
Went to the gym after dinner.
Walked home.
Watching Glee and being silly in love with people being in love.

Josh apparently hates Valentines Day. Good thing I don't care. I am content to loving myself, my friends, and my family on this beautiful day full of love.
When I was walking home, I saw so many adorable couples. Candlelight dinners.
And it made me oddly aware of the people walking alone as well.
I hope they are all as happy as me being alone :)

I LOVE YOU ALL.
REMEMBER THAT SOMEONE OUT THERE, SOMEONE LOVES YOU AND WILL LOVE YOU FOREVER.
HAPPY VALENTINES DAY LOVES!

Maxwell House commercial with Affirmation girl

Joe Nolan - Hold Me Up

Sometimes, you just have to remember that maybe your personal best is good enough.
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JUST RAN 9K!
I ran all the way to the other side of high level bridge, wrapped around to low level bridge, and then came all the way home :)
I feelll goooooooood.

Home was great.
I am wide awake due to having a "Flat white" today.
DELICIOUS.
Dose is the new-ish cafe located inside Sunworks on the top floor.
They are so urban and hipster. It's awesome!
Plus the drink was delicious.
I love that Red Deer is slowly becoming a small city with gems hidden all over.
I mean, I never would imagine the liberal minds of an Occupy movement in Red Deer, but there are some people who want this thing to go somewhere.
It's about time that RD became less conservative and started to embrace the future.
I think about the flamboyantly gay boy that works at RW&Co sometimes, and wonder how much bullying he's been through. But the fact that he works at a clothing store and people seem to love me makes me incredibly happy.
There's also the boy that works in the makeup department at the Bay. So delightful!
I love RD. I love my family so much.
Everything feels right in my little hometown. I can see myself settling down there one day. But years and years and years from now.
For now, I want to explore. I need to explore myself by being alone in new places and meeting different types of people.
Somehow, though, I feel like I'm destined to end up in Alberta. It just seems to be written in the books.

A feast of all you can eat sushi and other Japanese food items... Which I do not get to participate in.
Hehe. Vegetarianism holding me back again. Smells good!

I love being at home.
I miss home.
I miss coming home from work to a nice home-cooked meal.
To 2 or 3 more people happy to see me.
No worries about expenses. Friends that I've known and loved for years.
I miss working at home.
I'm such a whiny brat, but I love Red Deer.
I say I'm sick of it, but I'll never lose my love of this city.

Scuba! Scuba! Scuba!
I can't wait to go to Kelowna and go diving :)
Hurray hurray hurray!!
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Me: Why do you have so much money?
Tyler: Because I work a lot, I mean a lot.... And I have no girlfriend.

BAHAHAHA. So true.

"10k is so easy. Why would you even need to train for that?"
"I've done 30k on a bike before and I didn't need to train for it. It's not hard at all."

Words by Rachelle. She honestly hasn't done physical activity in like 4 years so I don't get where she gets this stupid crap to say. I bet she would run 3k and think it was 20. And the farthest she bikes is to downtown, which is like... 6 k from where she lives. She pisses me off.
More ranting on her I'm sure will come later. Don't mind me.
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So here's my blurb about Diane:

What is there to say about my oldest sister?
For one, I'd definitely say she's one of my role models. I look up to her to help me deal with situations that I don't know how to handle, and she surprisingly has come up with logical and appropriate solutions to them. She's been through a lot, especially growing up in a family like ours, and I really remember a time in my grade 12 year where I was really struggling with my relationship with my parents, and at that time, she seemed to know exactly what I needed to hear to get through my last months of high school. She's always been there when I've needed her, and I feel like I've always come first on her priority list. If there's something that comes up, she'll drop everything just to make sure I'm okay.
Now more about her personality. Ha. I would say that she's a blonde stuck in an Asian body. What comes to mind first is.. Anna Faris? Just kidding. I guess she's a bit ditzy at times, hilarious most of the time, and at the same time manages to be insightful , intellectual, and down to earth. She's generous and loves to spend time helping people. During university, she was the head of the Student Distress Center, and especially now that I am a student, I realize how much this organization contributed to mental health of students.
I guess what I'm really trying to say is that I'm incredibly lucky to have her as my sister. We've been through our phases, we've had our feuds, but in the end, what it comes down to is that we'll be here for each other no matter what. Time for a cliche: They always say that friends are the family that you chose, but she's the family that is family that I chose.

Corniness complete.
I hope your head swelled a bit.

Running is my remedy
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I was super flipping angry earlier today.
So far for my trip to Kelowna, I call it my trip because no one else seems to give a fuck about planning it so here I am doing all the work, I have called Thane and arranged all the scuba before and during the trip, I have planned the car ride (which requires me getting my oil changed so that I don't kill my vehicle, which I wouldn't have to do yet if I didn't drive to Saskatoon last weekend), and I am the only one looking into hotels/ place to stay.
So far Shane and Rachelle have done nothing.
Hmmm. I wonder what's wrong there.
So this weekend, I drove to Saskatoon... for Rachelle.
I let her take Meeka (her dog) in my car.
I didn't ask anything of her in return, except that maybe we can share the driving.
That didn't happen. Also, she didn't talk to me the whole car ride home.
She also didn't really want to explore Saskatoon and instead wanted to make a battleshots board instead of wandering downtown. I drove all this way for you to get ready for a party that we could have had in Edmonton?
She didn't say thank you for driving. She paid for gas though which should obviously be her fees. She didn't offer to drive when I said I was tired on the way home.
And today I was asking her about the hotel for Kelowna and she replied 'Look, I'm at work and don't have time for this right now. The review for Days Inn said it's fine. Just pick one.'
EXCUSE ME?! You're going to be snarky with me when I do way more than you in life, and I just drove you to Saskatoon to visit YOUR friend, and I'm planning this whole fucking trip to Kelowna?
What a bitch. That's all I have to say. I knew she was one, but the true bitch finally came out, so I'm sick of it. I don't enjoy making decisions when I always 'make the wrong decision'. She always says I can make the choices, and then is obviously disappointed with whatever I decide to do.
She can suck my dick. I can only be nice for so long.

Global Stoon.wmv

A whirlwind of emotions.
Scattered.
Frantic.
Devastated.
Incomplete.
Happy.
How can something so full of love.
Leave someone feeling so empty.
A heart of void.
A mind full of wonder.
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This seems to happen anytime I go anywhere for the weekend whether it be home or wherever.
I get sad when I get back to my home in Edmonton.
All the sadness comes from the 'what ifs'.
What if I stayed longer.
What if I had been nicer to that one person. What type of friendship or connection did I miss out on by not being there longer.
I had a blast last night. And now I wish I were in Saskatoon being friends with all those people.
They were so much fun. I stalked them on facebook.
All that I keep doing is wondering, what if what if what if.

Last night was a gong show.
A good party night drunken mess gong show.
The day started with going to All you can eat sushi and chinese buffet which was delicious and super filling!
Then we went to get supplies to build a battleshots board and got liquor.
We got home and built the board, went for coffee at a local shop called Broadway Cafe and wandered on Broadway Street.
When we got back to Sam's, some friends were already over and so she made us dinner of pasta and garlic bread. Sooooo good.
Me and Rachelle started playing battleshots (shots of beer) and then more people came over and we watched the Oilers game, played sociables, and met a whole bunch of fun Saskatoon people.
It was a blast! Sam's friends sure know how to drink. Haha.
After we were all sufficiently wasted, well at least I was, we went to the Hose!
There, we danced the night away. And I got strangled for most of the night because Sam's friend Blake decided he wouldn't let me go in his drunken state and whenever I tried to go anywhere, he would wrap his arm pretty much around my neck and not let go. Haha. He was a really nice guy though so it wasn't a big deal.
Another guy also tried to cheat on his girlfriend with me. Ick. He was one of Sam's roommates.
We finally got home and her friends refused to go home until she pretty much just told them to GTFO. Haha.
Overall, super fun and I love Saskatoon!
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Went for a morning walk since people like to sleep in. Here's a view of downtown from across the river :)

First night in Saskatoon:
Road trip was super fun! The roads are okay, not overly well paved but not gravel!
Took about 5 hours to get here including a stop in Lloyd. Starbucks and gas, yay!
Got to Sam's home and it is giant! Not new, but giant and in an area that I would call the whyte ave of Saskatoon. It's called Broadway! Haha. Pretty cool.
We watched a few episodes of the League, met some of her friends that were over, went to Subway and then had a few drinks at a place called Hose.
It once was a fire station, and has a firemen pole still. Pretty nice inside!
Then we got home and went to sleep. Delightful first night in Sask!
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800th post on this blog, and it's a happy one!
I only had to work 5 hours today, since I had overtime from Tuesday.
So I came home and it's gorgeous outdoors so I went for a little walk down Whyte!
Then I went for a 4.5k run outside, and now I'm just hanging out in my room and enjoying sunshine and relaxing :)
I can't wait to go to Saskatoon. It's going to be fun to see everything!


Have a good weekend kiddies!!!

I am going to make THIS casserole :)

So in my 365 questions a year book, I had to answer this question last night:
What is your resolution for tomorrow?
Well, my resolution for today was to eat healthy, exercise, be happy, and not hold grudges or be grumpy at anyone all day.
And I've completed my resolution.
I breathed off everything that sort of annoyed me.
I laughed things off.
And I enjoyed my day completely.
People ignored my texts? Oh well. They're probably busy.
People can go further into their yoga poses then me? I don't actually know because my focus was solely on myself for my class tonight.
Eat healthy? I had a cinnamon bun this morning with breakfast, but it was delicious and made me happy. I had delicious vegetarian chili provided to me by work (just like breakfast was), and then almonds, and some other snacks when I got home. Everything in moderation right?
People cut me off in traffic? They probably didn't see me there or are new drivers. Meh. As long as they didn't hit my car or injure anyone.

This is the way to live life. I lived in my own bubble today. Sure, I let people in and met new people. Sure, I still have to deal with other people's problems, but I won't get stressed out about it and let it affect how I behave. The problem is that people forget to move past things and dwell for far too long causing them to inhibit themselves. Forget what happened, and think about all the awesome things that can happen next.

I'm going to Saskatoon tomorrow with Rachelle to visit her friend Sam. I've heard that Saskatoon (Skoon) is beautiful, so I'm really looking forward to it. On the way, I'll get to see Lloydminster and Battleford, so I'm excited to experience a few new things this weekend. A road trip might be exactly what I need right now. A peaceful drive through the prairies with my best friend. Sounds pretty good.

Impromptu banana bread making session last night yielded a pretty good loaf of bread!
Simple recipe, all ingredients that I already had and only 5 minutes of mixing and an hour of baking! I sprinkled chopped walnuts on top.
It is tasty and has only the oil I use to grease the cake pan in it. I replaced the oil with applesauce. AWESOME!